Speedy vs Logan King vs Poison vs DX Latinvs Filth vs CJ Williams

[Drake Daniels]

1st Shot Ladder Match
Deadline:1.18.08 midnight eastern time

[Speedy]

A scene opens, and the camera focuses on a large structure, made solely of steel girders. Beginning to pan upwards, it shows the entirety of the skeletal building – about two stories tall. At the top, dancing around, performing acrobatics as if he were on the ground with safety mats down, is a man. The camera zooms in on his face, and a brief note flashes up that he is TEWF wrestler Speedy. The view returns to the ground, where Missy Vonage is holding a microphone and looking anxious. Speedy pauses briefly, then flips backwards from the building, taking hold of a girder and sliding down at high speed, hitting the ground rather heavily. Missy hurries over, and after a moment to check he is all right, speaks to first to the camera, and then addresses him.

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
I’m here with fresh TEWF talent, Speedy. How do you feel about having come to TEWF?

The wrestler looks at her with a frown, like there’s something he can’t quite work out, but after a moment or two, one of his trademark huge smiles breaks onto his face.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Well… I’m not sure it will be as much fun as Backyard wrestling to tell you the truth… all those tiresome rules. But I guess the stunts wow them more in the professional circuit, and I was made an offer I simply can’t refuse. Better yet, I’m allowed to keep my own training circuit, to a degree at least.

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
That sounds good for you. What are your thoughts on your TEWF debut?

Speedy looks somewhat alarmed at the question, as if he certainly had not been expecting it, indeed, his voice communicates his surprise perfectly, as well as confirming the reason for his shock.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Wait a second, I’m debuting? Nobody told me I had a match.

Missy Vonage | Backstage
Everybody gets an e-mail, I think, and they send the card too. It’s not like you live where TEWF if based, so you must have known.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
What? Oh, computers, yeah… and who reads paperwork anyway? And I came here on a bit of a holiday, I didn’t know I was actually going to be wrestling.

Speedy has a genuine and honest look on his face, it’s nigh on impossible to tell whether or not he is lying or just making some kind of joke. Accordingly, his interviewer is mystified.

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
Well, uh… you do.

Missy hands Speedy a copy of the card for the following week, and Speedy looks at it for a little while, finding his match and the opponents that he would be facing. Speedy looks rather speculative whilst he catches up on proceedings.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
First Shot match eh… and a ladder match too… I can see this working out nicely. At least you can’t get disqualified in a ladder match, that’s one less thing to worry about.

Missy Vonage |  Backstage Interviewer
And what do you think of your opponents, and their chances?

The interviewee holds up his hands, as if trying to ward off the question, not exactly seriously, but not totally joking either.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Hey, if you’re looking for an analysis, then go to the professionals, I’m no authority on them, even if I might have followed the original TEWF a little… most of these guys are brand new, like me.

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
You must have met them at some point, can’t you take a guess?

The wrestler considers that question for a little while, before replying, rather thoughtfully.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Guesswork is the most efficient form of deduction I suppose…

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
Who said that?

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Um… me. I just made it up on the spot. Anyway, methinks you want me to start doing my guessing, and believe me, I’ve got a lot of guessing to do. First off, I have five opponents, not only that, but a future title shot is also on the line. It’s a tall order for you to ask a guy to tell all about that many people in that kind of situation, especially when he doesn’t even have a professional wrestling background. But I suppose I’ll give it a try. Poison… that name sounds familiar, I know I wasn’t much of a TEWF fan, but I seem to recall that the guy used to roll with another partner. Well, there’s everything you want to know right there. In a six man match, he’s out of his element, nobody to watch his back, and five others all trying to get him at once. Tag team competitors usually have difficulty one on one, and this is five times that. Poison will crumble – there will be a time when he forgets himself and expects somebody to protect his back, and that’s when he gets a chair across it.

Far from ‘guesswork’ as he puts it, Speedy seems determined to lay to rest any talk, even a murmur that he won’t win the match. Although, when it comes down to it, words are simply words. If you can’t back up talk in the ring, then you shouldn’t even bother opening your mouth – or showing up.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
However… I’ve got respect for Poison to break out and try and take on a match like this, even if I don’t really like his chances. It’s another two guys that I’m instantly dismissive of – Dxtreme Latin, or DX Latin, or whatever the hell it is he calls himself, and his little henchman CJ Williams. I mean, this is Poison all over again, but without the bravery to strike out on their own. Instead of trying to stand alone, the pair of them have to try and find safety in numbers, they’ve got a clear advantage here, I mean, there’s two of them, and only one of each of us other four, but there’s something I don’t think they’ve factored into the equation. Namely, they both want to win. Taking out the opposition, two on one, is all very well but… when it comes down to just DX Latin and Williams, what’s going to happen then? I doubt that one or the other is going to intentionally go for a fall and let the other guy go up the ladder. Nah, that team is a time bomb, they should have stuck to their own division, and trying to get into singles is just going to cause them grief in the long run. To be honest, I’m a little doubtful that even together they have the credentials to prove a major force in the match. Just look at them: on the one hand you have the ‘Combination of Hooligan and Xtremist’ Exhibit A : D-Latin, and on the other ‘All Natural’ CJ Williams. Or, if you like, you have on the one hand an egocentric imitation of a risk taker, and on the other, a preening popinjay. I find that the more people brag about how much danger they put themselves in, the less they really will, and the more you talk yourself up, the less you actually have. Both fall into that camp, I don’t think either will win.

Speedy is in full flow right now, pacing slightly back and forth as the camera focuses on his intently concentrating face as he comes up with more and more to say about his opponents in the next match. Clearly there’s more to come, since there are five men in the match.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Who is up next? Well, it seems to be a guy whose name could not possibly be more apt. Filth. Yep, that’s right, utter filth. His wrestling? Filth. His music? Filth. His style? Filth. His hygiene? Filth. I can’t really find much more to say than that. He’s big, for sure, but there’s been bigger than him. He’s a little weird, but really, when it comes down to it, is he really that much out of the ordinary? He breaks stuff, wow, newsflash, people who break stuff usually get charged and arrested. So what you have is a felon wearing a mask, the perfect candidate for getting himself arrested again. I wouldn’t be surprised if he suddenly disappeared from TEWF before long, the subject of a rather discreet announcement ‘Oh sorry we hired a lunatic’ Man… all this talking about freaky guys is making me go to sleep, let’s find somebody else to profile.

The wrestler pretends to think for a moment or two before continuing.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Ah yes, Logan King, the final man in our little ladder match. Well… not much to say about him either to be honest. Seems to me all he is, all he can be, is some jumped up hardman who thinks he can cut it in the wrestling industry. But hey, who am I to judge him? Maybe he can, maybe he will be the next big thing. On the other hand, there is one thing that I can guarantee: he won’t be stepping over me on his way to the top. The highest spot has open season on it, at the moment it’s wide open. And if there is one thing I am, it’s not somebody who wastes his opportunities. There’s five people that I’m going to beat next week, five bodies that I’m going to leave broken in the ring behind me. TEWF had better go on notice, because Speedy has arrived, I am Just Plain Crazy! And the Insane One wants gold!

Speedy leaves the statement hanging, spinning from where he was stood and jumping up onto the scaffolding, nimbly springing from girder to girder in order to quickly make his way back up to the top, where he had previously been ‘training’ Missy still looks bemused, but she hides it and looks back into the camera.

Missy Vonage | Backstage Interviewer
Ladies and Gentlemen, there you have… Speedy.

The camera loses its focus and the scene fades.

[DXLatin]

Scene Opens

The camera pans around a TEWF Houseshow in Toronto Canada where DXLatin is about to make his enterance. The crowd waits silently until they hear the theme song of DXLatin , he walks down the ramp with his steel bat and a black sweater with a hood hanging loose , he gives in his cocky smile to the audience and slides into the ring. DXLatin grabs a microphone from a nearby Staff member and begins to speak.

Latin - Well , Well Well..  You didn't expect me to showup at a houseshow did you? , like when was the last time you saw DXtreme in a Houseshow?..lets see..ah yes , 2 years ago when TEWF first began I made my debut , I am a full blooded TEWF Orginal as is Bobby Ocean. Now before I talk about the match I have this Impact, I would just like to remind all of you that I am a former TEWF Tag Team Champion.. Former TEWF European Champion.. And my favorite.. TEWF Extreme **** Champion. What do you all notice? , those titles dont exist anymore but the Tag Titles. Which means I need a new, shiny, heavy title around my waist... the TEWF Heavyweight Championship and I garuntee all of you it will be around my waist soon because when I defeat all 5 men in the match , hold the briefcase up high , Ill be sure to be #1 contender.

Audience Begins to Boo

Latin - Lets talk about some of the opponents.. well theres Speedy and earlier Speedy had somthing to say about me , appertnly he really didn't know how to pronouce and say my name which is very emberassing for him , hes in the TEWF and he cant even say the name of a former TEWF Hall Of Famer , I got taken out of the TEWF Hall Of Fame early last year , and Im gonna take him out of the match and in to an ambulance after the match. You see.. he calls himself Speedy , but the question is does he have the speed to run his ass off when he relizes Im the one standing between him and the briefcase. Im glad we're gonna have a Ladder Match , because this is the Total EXTREME Wrestling Federation , and I will do what I do best , Prove how Extreme I am , because I am Extremly good, So Speedy get your little pink diary , mark TEWF Impact : , then under write DXLatin defeats me because I was not so good as I thought I was.

DXLatin begins to spin around his steel bat smiling.

Latin - Yea and now lets see.. whoelse in a vistim in the match.. ahh yea, this is a guy I could talk alot about.. Poison , haha I know this faggit , this fag runs his mouth , threathning little kids to were a Poison shirt instead of a DXLatin t-shirt , shows everyone how far hes gonna get close to getting the breifcase.. pfft! , but for real , Poison , hes been almost in all the wrestling companies I was in , WWKF , TEWF and JWF , and I''ve seen the same thing over and over again , lose after loss after loss , and this Impact wont be any differn't , sure he is the first superstar to hold 2 titles in TEWF History but come on this is the man the buys a plastic TEWF Heavyweight title at Wallmart and carrys it around to all his autograph signings. This is why its gonna be an easy match , because you got people like Poison in it , hes like the Hornswoggle of the WWE , just a complete joke , and I know how Hornswoggle and MrMcMahon are "related" but I somtimes think Steve Norman and Poison would be related because of how much times Poison would suck up to him to get a title shot! , so Poison prepare yourself at Impact , cuz everytime you climb the ladder Im always gonna be up there , ready to push you down.

DXLatin has a cocky smile still hes just smiling in confidence and he stands there in the middle of the ring watching the crowd boo him.

Latin - Yea and how about "Filth"...man lets just say the ring is gonna be filthy and Im gonna use Filth to clean the ring.. I dont know the bastard , and I dont want to know the bastard , he looks like a dumbass and I cant wait for him to throw a punch at me cuz I will take that fist and just shove it up his "Filthy" ass.

DXLatin looks up and points at the cieling where the briefcase is suppose to be , he then makes the title around the waist tuant.

Latin - And now we get to Logan King , King Logan whatever suits him best , because I knopw for a fact he goes to Burger King and buys them little plastic crowns , infact he probobly takes his dates to Burger King and goes "Im King Logan , see my crown , Im King Of The Burgers since Latin Is King Of The Wrestling World". So this is another dumb retard who should prepare himself cuz after the Ladder Match nobody is going out 100%...well nobody but me , and I know talking like this may result in everyone other than CJ ganing up on me but thats what I like , let em do that , cuz theres a code I live by : Pacman Code , and for all of you who are not fimiliar with that code its simple , have you ever played Pacman? , those little guys that wanna eat you , what happens when you eat them? , they probobly dissapear for 5 seconds but they come back and thats like me you may knock me down , you may knock me out or you just may do your finisher on me but I will get back up , I will try , and I will kick your ass , so Logan tell your friends , your family and your kids , on Impact tune in to watch DXLatin kick my ass!.

The crowd's boos get louder but that is music to DXLatins ears as his smile grows.

Latin - Now now, Last before least CJ Williams , Hey Man I know your watching , I didn't get a chance to meet you and since Im clearly the only Xtreme one in the match and your clearly my **** , stay out of my way and stay out of me winning because of you want to stay in "Doctors of Xtreme" , you gotta follow Xtreme rules and I mean DXtreme Rules , cuz Im telling you , in TEWF , the years that I have been here , I am known for betraying my partners , I've done it millions of times , and Ill do it millions of times again , so CJ keep that in your mind or the steel bat hits you on the throat to blow your mind...

DXLatin drops the Mic and his smile fades his theme hits the stage and he walks out of the ring raising his arms up in the air

Scene Fades

[Speedy]

The scene opens to a busy street, people walking each way, past the camera and from behind it. Somebody walks by, then stops suddenly, patting his pockets, then pulling out a phone. The screen is obscured, and the figure watches it intently for a few moments, before snorting with laughter and slowly turning around to face the camera. Underneath the hood of a jumper is, predictably, the face of Speedy, smiling as always, though the smile seems more genuine than insane, as if he is actually amused as opposed to just mental. Speedy starts speaking to the camera.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
You know, I was just walking along, minding my own business, when my phone went off. Now, I wasn't expecting a message, so naturally I was quite curious. What do I find but that DXLatin has made an appearence at a Houseshow, and had a few words to say. This friend of mine was actually in the audience, and he managed to get a pretty good video of the whole thing, which, you guessed it, is what he sent me. Man... I didn't know that the guy I'm going to be facing off against at Impact was such a wit, truly, he is. In fact, his witticisms have stunned me into silence, I've been thoroughly put in my place I can tell you. I mean, that determination when he spoke about how I couldn't say his name... marvellous! Abruptly, all of the sarcasm slides straight off of Speedy's voice, and he begans speaking deadly seriously. You know what? I could not care less about the proper pronounciation of the gay's... I mean, guy's... name. DXLatin? Wow, it doesn't make any difference whether or not I can say it properly, and contrary to what he seems to think, I'm really not particularly embarassed about not saying the goddamn name. He's a former, I stress former TEWF Hall of Famer, how does that look? Maybe the circumstances were a little different, but the primary and easiest assumption to make is that my good friend Latin did something so stupid they decided that maybe it hadn't been such a good idea to put him in the Hall of Fame after all.

The smile, which so recently had been ordinary, has by now widened into the familiar insane grin. It seemed to lack any trace of good humour, Speedy might as well have had a sign above him reading 'I'm going to kill you!!' The youngster might not be a rulebreaker, but he sure as hell didn't have every single screw in the right place. For somebody who was supposed to be a nice guy, Speedy most certainly did not look the right part.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Is Latin supposed to have a reputation of being good on the mic? I sincerely hope not, he is a disgrace to every man to ever claim to be a mic-miester. He can make a generic comment about my nickname. Incredible, it's not like anybody has ever said anything like that to me before! That man shows the greatest lack of imagination and forethought since Mother Latin and Father Latin decided that maybe using protection wasn't such a good idea. You know what, right now, what I'm going to do is: take my... Speedy smiles ironically, raising both eyebrows before continuing. Little pink diary, mark off TEWF Houseshow, and write down: DXLatin makes a total fool of himself attempting to scramble for a decent insult. And I'm not just talking about what he said to me, I'm talking about everything. I mean, seriously people, Logan King, Burger King? What the hell!? That was a travesty of trash talking, he should keep his mouth shut, for then he might not disgrace himself so frequently - only with his ring skills, as opposed to... well... all of the time. There are some who are cut out for that kind of thing. Unfortunately for him, and his burgeoning ego, DXLatin is not part of some, in this instant. He is included in other 'somes' though, so he should not despair! He is part of the Doctors of Xtreme - Some bunch of losers. He is also quite Some moron. Most importantly, he is no more talented than Some bum they could bring in off the street. And there you have it - the Somes of DXlatin!

Speedy makes as if to turn away, and indeed he takes several steps back down the pavement before pausing, as if something had suddenly occured to him. In a short space of time the wrestler has returned to the camera, still looking as insecure and demented as he ever did.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
Alright, there's one last thing that has been bugging me, and it's these constant references to me 'Not being Extreme enough'. Let me tell you all something, and yeah, DXLatin can listen in too. I made my way, originally, backyard wrestling, in matches where absolutely anything was legal, and absolutely anything might be put into play. I've been slammed through a steel grating, I've been knocked out being thrown off a stage, and still managed to tie with my opponent. I've had a light tube smashed into my head. I've put somebody clean through the roof of a building. When you've got that kind of background and some idiot starts going on about how 'Xtreme' he is, just because he decided to put the word in his name, and accusing you of not having that same spark, it really tends to get on your nerves. Now I'm just glad that this is a No-DQ match, because I'm going to do my dammendest to bring along my bag of tricks, and in beating Latin from pillar to post -as well as KO'ing the other four guys too, I hope to show DXLatin the real definition of the word Extreme. And by God, once he's learned it, Latin is never going to say that his pathetic excuse of being that, stands up anything like the real thing. Oh, and once I Dragon Smash your ass so hard that you break your spine... don't say I didn't warn you...

Speedy pauses for a few moments, then looks back into the camera and begins to speak brightly again.

Speedy | Just Plain Crazy
On a lighter note, I see that my good old chum DXLatin has decided that he's going to wrestle this match solo. At least that dilemma is solved, and once again, it simply exhibits the backstabbing nature the guy has. You won't stick up for your partner? In fact, you flat out tell him that you would betray him without a second thought? Sheesh... what on earth would possess you to join up with a partner so totally unreliable as that? Well... on the Western front, I see that nobody except Latin has actually bothered to say anything about our match yet. I really can't be bothered to talk about him for any longer - don't they say that if you talk about something really bad for long enough the malaise starts rubbing off on you? I don't know, but I don't want to risk it either. So let's have a recap. Since Filth is obviously so weird and peculiar that he probably ate the card when they sent it to him, I think we can probably rule out the chance of seeing the man until the match day itself. And maybe not even then - you never know these reclusive sorts. Poison... well, still not much more to say about Poison. Considering how much Latin seems to dislike him he must be alright, otherwise he wouldn't be turning green with envy. On that side of things... looking forward to meet you man! Logan King... well, burger king knocks aside, I still have nothing to say about him apart from the fact that he spawned another godawful analogy - two in fact. I mean, the Pacman code? Urgh... reroute my eardrums, I can't believe I just heard something referred to as that. Still, I tell you what, and this is to Latin again, if you can get up from me breaking your damn neck, then you can follow any code you like.  Finally CJ Williams.... the lapdog, he hasn't said anything yet either, and to be honest, I'm glad of it. If Latin is his superior, Williams must be worse than Latin himself. Oh! The sheer horror of it! That thought denies comprehension! I feel like I require a scouring of the brain after contemplating that enventuality! So far, it's clear to me, though I don't know what the public think, that the only possible winner is the High-flying, full tempo, risk-taking, biggest octave, Just Plain Crazy, Backyarder from Hell... Speedy. Catch you later - if nobody else decides to make an idiot of themselves between now and next week, I'll see you at Impact. If not... you'll hear from me very soon...

Speedy glowers into the camera and suddenly wheels away, disappearing into the throng crowding the pavement, causing the camera to slowly fade to black as Speedy's second scene thusfar ends.

[Filth]

The camera cuts on showing a man staring straight into the camera. It's Filth, and he is in his familiar straight-jacket sitting cross-legged on the floor. As the camera zooms out, the scene behind is of a somewhat well-furnished home with various trophies Filth owns in a large glass case of his. Filth chuckles and the camera's attention goes to Filth once again.

Filth: Welcome to my abode world, you are seeing my home in the place known currently as New Orleans Louisiana. It's odd, many people would be surprised that a so called "pyschopath" as myself would live in a dwelling as I do. As you have possibly seen, it is reasonably clean and neat, unlike the stereotypical madman would have his surroundings in chaos and unorderly. Yet not all men are like that.

Filth stands up and struggles with his jacket before getting his right arm free and walks to his fireplace and starts a fire. He goes into his kitchen briefly and emerges with champagne offering it to the cameraman who gladly accepts.

Filth: Histories' greatest men were all considered madmen, some may have been a little others were just great men not following propaganda and paving their own path to history. Men like Theodore Roosevelt, Albert Einstein, Napoleon, Sun Tzu were all criticised by their enemies and peers alike yet forged ahead. Their brutality, and sheer will power brought them friend and foe, fame and ruin, health and disease alike. And like them, I consider myself the outcast of the TEWF as they were to their worlds. I align with noone, and have made nothing but enemies in my brief time here. And now, I get my oppurtunity in the ladder match to claim not only victory but a title match along with the satisfaction of tossing salt into their wounds

Filth sips his wine and and grins. He takes a small gulp of the wine and leans forward strapping himself in his straight-jacket before continuing.

Filth: Now I am not going to beat around the bush here. My three opponents, whose names I know not of and care less to know of, and myself all wish for victory. Yet only one can claim it. I have seen much of these men's capabilities, and they are great I must admit, yet I am the wildcard here. Not many people have seen me in action, seen the damage I am capable of inflicting once I have unleashed the "Abomination" inside. They insult me and stereotype me due to my abnormality and that is fine, I welcome it. But I have only one thing to say to you my dear fellows, when I rise to that ladder, and the Abomination begins the Triumphant Nightmare over the TEWF, only you will have yourselves to blame. Die Die My Darlings....

Filth stares into the camera grinning ear to ear beneath his mask as the camera slowly fades into slight, the complete darkness.

[Logan King]

AA Meeting?

The dark background from the camera lens is finally uncovered and we can see a big Monster Truck screaming down the road , swerving in and out of cars just barely missing them, the truck knocks over a rusty old “STOP” sign before slamming into a traffic light. The truck then makes a sharp right turn and nearly tips over, however the driver just about manages to keep the monstrosity on its dark four wheels. Eventually the truck comes to an abrupt halt and a huge puff of grey poisonous smoke blasts out the trucks huge exhaust pipe. Now the truck has stopped going at such a terrible speed we can clearly see the blood red paint accompanied by black designs with white stars all over it. The door then suddenly swings out and we can see a black cowboy hat slowly exit the vehicle, the figure then raises his head and it is now clear that the man in the truck (Who was driving in an extremely drunk manner) is “The Supernova” Logan King, King puts a foot on the steel steps to get out of the truck, but unfortunately slips and falls to the cold, hard gravel flat on his face, King immediately gets up in a comedic way and gives the camera a rather drunken thumbs up. He then steps aside and points to the open door of the truck and a fiery red haired woman steps out of the truck sexually, she is wearing a blue crop top with a blue and black mini skirt accompanied by black boots, she, unlike King manages to get out of the truck normally and not lose half of her teeth. The camera then skims across to Logan King who is wearing his signature black trench coat with white stars on the back and also his signature black cowboy hat. Underneath the coat he is wearing a plain white tee shirt, on his lower body he is wearing a pair of light blue jeans with a black belt and golden belt buckle, which ironically is a beer bottle tilted in a diagonal direction. He is also wearing a pair of black cowboy boots which his jeans are untidily tucked into. The red headed woman who will now be known as Holly Young reaches up and shuts the truck door before Logan King whips out his black car keys and pushes a button to lock it’s door, he then pushes the keys into his jeans pocket. King then takes a hold of Holly Young’s hand. Holly has to keep Logan King up straight otherwise he might have another little accident, they then see the building they were looking for, it is a single story building and it is quite long, King drunkenly walks whilst Holly skips holding his hand, they reach the building and King reaches for the shiny gold door knob, however King trips and smashes his forehead onto the door knob, Holly tuts as King gets up and try’s again, this time he gets a firm grip on the door knob and twists it, he then pushes the door open with force, making the door fling open and smack a person on the other side of the door, this sends the person into a plant pot which smashes and the unlucky man is now covered in soil. Logan King points to the man and laughs before nearly falling over again, Holly Young giggles and takes hold of King’s hand once more, she leads him to a desk with a small sign on it reading “Reception.” Sitting at the desk is a middle aged woman with blond hair wrapped up in a bun, Holly then talks to the receptionist.

Holly Young:
Hello miss, how are you today.

Receptionist:
Why hello there young lady, I am very well thank you for asking, how can I help you on this fine day?

Holly Young:
Do you know where the AA group meets? As you can see, my boyfriend needs a little bit of counseling, don’t you think?

Receptionist:
Boyfriend? Are you sure it isn’t you that needs counseling?

Holly Young:
Excuse me!? My boyfriend is right he…re.

The receptionist gives Holly a gentle smile and points her to a therapists door. Holly has a confused look on her face before she hears a loud scream and sees three or four woman run out of the ladies toilet, Holly breathes a sigh of relief as Logan King steps out of the woman’s restrooms with a roll of toilet paper in his hand, he shakes the roll of paper off and opens his mouth and begins to shout in a very slurred voice.

“The Supernova” Logan King:
Hey! Why are you all running? This is the men’s bathroom right? I just thought with your beards and hairy legs that you were men, my bad ladies, lets meet up sometime, say 11? Great see you there…

King then collapses on a nearby sofa and falls to sleep, he then loudly snores as Holly turns back to the shocked receptionist and gives her a sarcastic smile.

Holly Young:
That boyfriend. Mmmhhmmm.

Receptionist:
Oh right, sorry miss, umm. Oh, sorry what did you want again? I got caught up with your boyfriend…

Holly Young interrupts with a very angry look on her beautiful face.

Holly Young:
You did WHAT to my boyfriend?!!

Receptionist:
Sorry, what I meant too say was, because of all the havoc that just occurred thanks to your boyfriend, I forgot what you needed, would you care to remind me? Wait, let me guess, an AA meeting was it?

Holly Young:
Yes…Yes it was, now would you care to point me in the direction of this meeting? Or will I have to make my own way there.

Receptionist:
Oh right, you just go down this corridor and it’s the third door on your left, got it?

Holly Young:
Yes, I did “GET IT.”

The ravishing Holly Young puts on a sarcastic smile for the receptionist and the middle aged woman cowers away slightly, Holly then flicks her fiery red hair one way and walks off to the couch where her drunken boyfriend has passed out. Holly slowly bends down and taps King on his shoulder which makes him murmur.

“The Supernova” Logan King:
Please no… No… Don’t do it…. NO MORE GRAVY!!

Holly Young:
Don’t worry, we’ll have chicken burgers tonight honey, no gravy whatsoever.

Holly gives herself an exceedingly pleased smile before trying to help her man to his feet, she grabs him by the hand and pulls with all her might, but trying not to draw attention to herself at the same time. She whispers something angrily to Logan before he raises his head and some spit dangles out of his mouth, Holly looks a tad disgusted but she carries on pulling. She then eventually pulls him off the sofa but unfortunately she falls onto her rear and King rolls off the couch and lands again…Flat on his face. King suddenly gets up and shouts out…

“The Supernova” Logan King:
I’m Okay!!

Holly gets up with a rather angry face, she coughs and straightens out her skirt before opening her mouth and getting ready to speak.

Holly Young:
So am I.

Holly Young glances over to the receptionist who is letting out a little giggle, Holly goes back over to the woman but this time with Logan King. The receptionist then pretends to be reading something as the couple reach the desk.

Holly Young:
Something funny? Hmmm?

Receptionist:
I’m sorry? I was reading this book, what are you talking about?

Holly then smiles at the receptionist before taking the book out of her hand and turning it around.

Holly Young:
Wow, you can read upside down? You must be one talented woman, that or you have no life and you teach yourself worthless talents that will get you absolutely NOWHERE in life!

Receptionist:
Oh, okay I am sorry I laughed, please just go where you need to be, there is a line of customers behind you and to be frank you are embarrassing yourself in front of them.

Holly and Logan look behind them to see a total of one person standing behind them, looking quite worried for the receptionists health and well being. Holly and Logan swing their heads back to the receptionist and raise their eyebrows, they then shake their heads and walk away holding hands. Holly and Logan walk down the corridor and turn to a door they see closest to them, they enter the room and see two men kissing each other, they are both dressed up in doctors outfits and are on the doctors bed, Holly and Logan watch wide eyed before Holly slowly closes the door and stares at Logan King.

“The Supernova” Logan King:
I may be drunk, but I think that was the wrong door.

Holly Young:
*Sigh* Yeah.

Holly and King share a brief giggle with each other before they walk down the corridor looking for the door for the AA meeting, Holly has obviously forgotten about what the receptionist had told her where to go. Logan looks at a door for a few seconds before nodding his head and slowly grabbing the handle and pulling it down, King then opens the door and there is two newly born babies sitting in a crib.

Baby #1:
Well, what do you think the ratio of X to the power of Q would be if pie equaled 3.982 to the power of 13?

Baby #2:
Ahh, very challenging question baby number one, I simply have no idea would you care to tell me the answer?

Baby #1 then sees Logan King and Holly Young standing in the doorway looking very puzzled and confused.

Baby #1:
Waaaaa!! Goo Goo Gaa Gaa!

Baby #2:
Well I have never heard that equation before, is it new?

The second baby then turns around to see Logan King and Holly Young, he then starts crying along with his friend, King and Young close the door again and scream under their breath before racing too another door, they are about to open it until the receptionist shouts to them.

Receptionist:
It’s the door opposite the one you are at!

Logan King and Holly Young let out a brief sigh of relief and give each other a kiss before Holly squeezes Logan’s hand and they enter the door. There they see a circle of chairs with people sat in them, there is a white board in the corner of the room with an elderly gentlemen at it writing down the evils of drink. As expected there is a spare seat for Logan, so he goes and sits down whilst Holly waits in the corner of the room for King to be done with the class. The elderly gentlemen then turns around and sees Logan in his chair, he smiles at Logan and Logan gives him a thumbs up, the man then puts the lid on the whiteboard pen on and places the pen on his table, he then gets in the middle of the circle of chairs and speaks…

AA Leader:
Hello ladies and gentlemen, I am your leader for this class, if you do not know me my name is Michael Trench, but you can all just call me Mike if you want. Now we all know that we are here because we are trying to get rid of our evils of alcohol, I too have had problems with drink but I got over it thanks to my friends at the AA society in Wisconsin. Now what I want to do is scan through the new people of this class and get their names and why they turned to the drink. So lets start with you miss.

A woman in her thirties stands up, she is quite plump and short, she brushes back her greasy brown hair with her hands and lets her feelings out.

Woman:
Hello, my name is Patricia Williams and I am an alcoholic. I turned to the drink a few years ago because my boyfriend abused me, I thought it would ease the pain and it did in the short term, but in the long term it has affected me deeply and I cannot stop…

“The Supernova” Logan King:
Booooorrriiinnggg!! God, he didn’t ask for your life story!

AA Leader:
Please sir, we all respect each other in this class.

Logan King looks solemn and the woman sits down in her seat, King whispers sorry to her and she nodes her head with a smile. King leans back in his seat.

AA Leader:
Right, now you young man, would you care to stand up and tell us about yourself?

A very familiar looking young man stands up, he has blonde hair with brown highlights and looks a pit like the TNA wrestler Chris Sabin. He looks quite shy but speaks anyway.

“The Shining Wizard” Travis Jeffries:
Hello, my name is Travis Jeffries and I am too an alcoholic, I turned to the drink after the TEWF version one flopped when I became champion, another reason is that my best friend John and his girlfriend Milana just turned on me and found themselves another partner who goes by the name of Psycho Dave, I then really became addicted to the drink when I found out that Psycho Dave had not only stole my best friends and my finishing move, he had also stole… My face.

The crowd gasp in horror as Travis Jeffries sits down back in his seat and a small tear rolls down his eye,  Holly Young  goes over to Travis and comforts him whilst Logan King looks sad for him.

AA Leader:
Well sir, looks like you are the only person left, would you care to stand up and tell us why you are here?

Logan King then stands up looking confused. He raises his right eyebrow at the AA Leader and turns his head at all the depressed people in their seats.

“The Supernova” Logan King:
Well… Um hi, my name is ermm… Wait, oh yeah my name is Logan King and I am an alcoholic. I really dunno why I am ‘ere though.

AA Leader:
You are here Logan, because you want to rid yourself of the evils of drink, you want to grasp the alcohol and throw it out of your life FOREVER!

“The Supernova” Logan King:
That’s why I am here? Damn. I don’t wanna give up the drink, alcohol is AWESOMEEEE!!! Here, Travis man, have a drink on me, it will cheer you up!

Logan King rummages through his coat pocket and pulls out a bottle of beer, he opens it with his teeth and chucks it to Travis, Travis then shrugs his shoulder and downs it in one. King then passes one to Patricia who drinks that aswell. Logan then passes around beers to all of the other member of the AA class and they all drink it in one and become quite tipsy. Logan smiles with all his heart and nods his head whilst bouncing in his chair like a child who has become very hyper. The AA leader swipes the beer out of the members hands and throws it all away, all the people complain and scream and shout for more.

AA Leader:
What have you done!? My work is ruined, some of these people haven’t touched a drink in three years and you have ruined it! Get out, get out now! And take your jezebel of a girlfriend with you!

Holly and Logan laugh at the man before King covers his mouth and points to the elderly gentlemen, Holly then realizes what he called her and the man looks quick to apologize but Holly won’t have any of it, she walks up to the man and slaps him across the face, she then struts away with Logan who keeps looking behind him and laughing at the man, the man holds his jaw and whips out the almost empty bottles of beer in the bin and drinks the last drops of them, the crowd cheer for King and Young as they exit the room holding hands, the couple then storm down the corridor and past the receptionist desk, they then grab the door and storm out of the building whilst Logan is still laughing, King then unlocks the door to the monster truck and Holly climbs the metal steps and opens the door, she then gets in and King follows her and gets to the wheel before revving up the engine. King then opens his window all the way and rests his arm on the side of the door, he then shouts to the camera…

“The Supernova” Logan King:
Speedy, DX Latin, CJ Williams, Filth and Poison… Prepare To Meet The Wraith!

King then winds the window up and adjusts his cowboy hat before speeding off, swerving in and out of cars just barely missing them, he then speeds off into the distance as the camera is left with nothing more to see until King and Young cut a promo again.

--End--