Total Extreme Wrestling Federation
March 28, 2024, 05:08:00 am
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
News: Vist the offical TEWF v2 homepage
http://www.freewebs.com/tewfv2/index.htm
 
  Home Help Search Staff List Login Register  

Chuck Norris

Pages: 1 2 [3] 4
  Print  
Author Topic: Chuck Norris  (Read 890 times)
Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #30 on: January 19, 2008, 03:40:14 pm »

THe facts

"You don't insult Chuck Norris, you're already dead."

value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lu1wNxr9Sqg&rel=1"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lu1wNxr9Sqg&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>
« Last Edit: January 19, 2008, 03:42:50 pm by Dynamite » Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Punkstar
Full Member
***
Posts: 151


Dead ****! & Detective Joe!


View Profile
« Reply #31 on: January 19, 2008, 03:41:39 pm »

THe facts

"You don't insult Chuck Norris, you're already dead."

<object width="425" height="355"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/lu1wNxr9Sqg&rel=1"></param><param name="wmode" value="transparent"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/lu1wNxr9Sqg&rel=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="355"></embed></object>

HA
Failed.
Report Spam   Logged

-V1.0 Accomplishments-
1x TEWF Tag Team Champion (w/ Dynamite)


"The Original" PunkStar
03-00-00
Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #32 on: January 19, 2008, 03:43:17 pm »

it still worked
Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Punkstar
Full Member
***
Posts: 151


Dead ****! & Detective Joe!


View Profile
« Reply #33 on: January 19, 2008, 03:46:31 pm »

it still worked

Then maybe my internet is failing =[
I can't see anything lol
Report Spam   Logged

-V1.0 Accomplishments-
1x TEWF Tag Team Champion (w/ Dynamite)


"The Original" PunkStar
03-00-00
Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #34 on: January 19, 2008, 03:48:55 pm »

i can
































****
Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Punkstar
Full Member
***
Posts: 151


Dead ****! & Detective Joe!


View Profile
« Reply #35 on: January 19, 2008, 03:50:46 pm »

Lol
Report Spam   Logged

-V1.0 Accomplishments-
1x TEWF Tag Team Champion (w/ Dynamite)


"The Original" PunkStar
03-00-00
Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #36 on: January 19, 2008, 03:52:36 pm »

Chuck norrion once shot a man but pointing at him and saying bang
Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #37 on: January 19, 2008, 03:53:23 pm »

all world records are help but chuck norris the names in the book are just the people that have come second
Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Mike Copani
G-Mod
Sr. Member
*****
Posts: 324


TEWF ORIGINAL.


View Profile
« Reply #38 on: January 19, 2008, 03:54:51 pm »

I heard those jokes on The Best Damn Sports Show on ESPN!
Report Spam   Logged



                           *02/00/01*
Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #39 on: January 19, 2008, 04:09:26 pm »

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
 
Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.
 
Chuck Norris uses redhot lava to moisturize his skin.
 
Chuck Norris invented the apple.
 
Chuck Norris Buillt Mount Everest with a bucket and spade.
 
Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.
 
Chuck Norris does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts. You have virtually no chance of surviving the venomous sting, unless treated immediately. The pain is so excruciating and overwhelming that you would most likely go into shock and collapse a split second before getting hit in the face with a roundhouse kick.
 
Chuck Norris can chug a gallon of milk and not throw up.
 
Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.
 
If you get roundhouse kicked in the face by Chuck Norris in your dream, you DIE!
 
Chuck Norris can have his cake AND eat it too.
 
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his bare hands.
 
Some people get lucky and kill two birds with one stone.  Chuck Norris once killed four birds with half a stone.  What's that?  You say there's no such thing as half a stone?  The four dead birds didn't think so either.
 
Chuck Norris CAN lick his elbow.
 
P is for Chuck Norris, as is every other letter of the alphabet.
 
Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.
 
Chuck Norris' paradise is war.
 
Chuck Norris is capable of photosynthesis.
 
Chuck Norris has never had a surprise birthday party. He can NEVER be surprised. EVER.
 
Chuck Norris does not love Raymond.
 
Chuck Norris can lick his own elbows. At the same time.
 
Chuck Norris can kick start a car.
 
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
 
Chuck Norris wrote an autobiography....it was just a list of everyone he has killed.
 
Einstein's original Theory of Relativity was; if Chuck Norris kicks you, your relatives will feel it.
 
Bigfoot takes pictures of Chuck Norris.
 
As seen in Sidekicks, Chuck Norris can climb a rope with one hand, and one hand only.
 
Chuck Norris does not dance.  He roundhouse kicks to the beat.
 
Chuck Norris can MAKE water run uphill.
 
Chuck Norris can hold Puff Daddy down.
 
The moon is actually a comet that was once on course to hit earth... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it into orbit.
 
Chuck Norris can strike a match on a bar of soap.
 
Chuck Norris once played Russian roulette with a fully load gun and won.
 
The only reason the color pink still exists is because Chuck Norris is color blind.
 
Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.
 
Chuck Norris isn't afraid of Urban Legends, he is an Urban Legend.
 
Chuck Norris once played 18 holes of golf using a 12 inch strip of rebar and a sun dried tomato. He shot a 54.
 
On the Asian market, Chuck Norris' urine is worth $400 per fluid ounce.
 
See spot. See spot run.  See spot get round house kicked in the face by Chuck Norris.
 
Niagra Falls is the result of one of Chuck's legendary cannon balls.
 
Chuck Norris sneezes electricity.
 
Chuck Norris performs colonoscopies on himself.
 
If you were killed by Chuck Norris, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.
 
Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.
 
You know he jumped off the Empire State Building this one time and he only sprained his ankle.
 
Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident....and still managed to walk it off.
 
Contrary to popular belief the Lottery numbers are not random. They are just the number of people Chuck Norris killed that given day.
 
Chuck norris invented the corndog.
 
The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain.  Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now.  Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.
 
Chuck Norris IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
 
Chuck Norris understands the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey.
 
Chuck Norris belives the hype.
 
Chuck Norris CAN in fact stop the beat.
 
When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
 
When Chuck Norris picks his nose, he REALLY does find Gold.
 
Chuck Norris speaks in all caps.
 
Chuck Norris delivers more male with one thrust of his pelvis than the U.S. Postal Service and the Pony Express have combined for the last 146 years.
 
Chuck Norris wasn't born with feet, just boots.
 
Chuck Norris won a pissing contest against a Russian race horse.
 
When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang, the boomerang does not return because it is scared to come back.
 
Chuck Norris floats like a butterfly and stings like a tomahawk missile. At mach 3. In the face.
 
Chuck Norris can dribble a football.
 
Chuck Norris’ IQ can be expressed simply as a sideways eight
 
Chuck Norris is a stunt double for Optimus Prime.
 
Chuck Norris was once asked to repeat himself.  The last thing that person ever heard was the wooshing sound of a roundhouse kick.
 
Chuck Norris can clap with one hand.
 
Chuck Norris had his tonsels removed with a chainsaw.
 
Chuck Norris digs graves with a shoe horn
Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Dynamite
Full Member
***
Posts: 197


The Racist Dragon


View Profile
« Reply #40 on: January 19, 2008, 04:19:28 pm »


Report Spam   Logged

.::TEWF MESSIAH::.
V.1
1x TEWF Undisputed Champion
2x TEWF Tag Team Champion(w/Punkstar)(w/SBK)
60x 24/7 **** Champion
W/17-D/01-L/08
V.2
W/00-D/00-L/00

Mike Copani
G-Mod
Sr. Member
*****
Posts: 324


TEWF ORIGINAL.


View Profile
« Reply #41 on: January 19, 2008, 04:19:58 pm »

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
 
Chuck Norris has a vacation home on the sun.
 
Chuck Norris uses redhot lava to moisturize his skin.
 
Chuck Norris invented the apple.
 
Chuck Norris Buillt Mount Everest with a bucket and spade.
 
Chuck Norris does not age. Every birthday, it's just another year added to his existence, which sucks for you.
 
Chuck Norris does not have chest hair, he has millions of highly venomous nematocysts. You have virtually no chance of surviving the venomous sting, unless treated immediately. The pain is so excruciating and overwhelming that you would most likely go into shock and collapse a split second before getting hit in the face with a roundhouse kick.
 
Chuck Norris can chug a gallon of milk and not throw up.
 
Chuck Norris beat the Sun in a staring contest.
 
If you get roundhouse kicked in the face by Chuck Norris in your dream, you DIE!
 
Chuck Norris can have his cake AND eat it too.
 
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin that he built with his bare hands.
 
Some people get lucky and kill two birds with one stone.  Chuck Norris once killed four birds with half a stone.  What's that?  You say there's no such thing as half a stone?  The four dead birds didn't think so either.
 
Chuck Norris CAN lick his elbow.
 
P is for Chuck Norris, as is every other letter of the alphabet.
 
Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.
 
Chuck Norris' paradise is war.
 
Chuck Norris is capable of photosynthesis.
 
Chuck Norris has never had a surprise birthday party. He can NEVER be surprised. EVER.
 
Chuck Norris does not love Raymond.
 
Chuck Norris can lick his own elbows. At the same time.
 
Chuck Norris can kick start a car.
 
Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
 
Chuck Norris wrote an autobiography....it was just a list of everyone he has killed.
 
Einstein's original Theory of Relativity was; if Chuck Norris kicks you, your relatives will feel it.
 
Bigfoot takes pictures of Chuck Norris.
 
As seen in Sidekicks, Chuck Norris can climb a rope with one hand, and one hand only.
 
Chuck Norris does not dance.  He roundhouse kicks to the beat.
 
Chuck Norris can MAKE water run uphill.
 
Chuck Norris can hold Puff Daddy down.
 
The moon is actually a comet that was once on course to hit earth... then Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it into orbit.
 
Chuck Norris can strike a match on a bar of soap.
 
Chuck Norris once played Russian roulette with a fully load gun and won.
 
The only reason the color pink still exists is because Chuck Norris is color blind.
 
Chuck Norris is allowed to talk about Fight Club.
 
Chuck Norris isn't afraid of Urban Legends, he is an Urban Legend.
 
Chuck Norris once played 18 holes of golf using a 12 inch strip of rebar and a sun dried tomato. He shot a 54.
 
On the Asian market, Chuck Norris' urine is worth $400 per fluid ounce.
 
See spot. See spot run.  See spot get round house kicked in the face by Chuck Norris.
 
Niagra Falls is the result of one of Chuck's legendary cannon balls.
 
Chuck Norris sneezes electricity.
 
Chuck Norris performs colonoscopies on himself.
 
If you were killed by Chuck Norris, your tombstone would read RIP, ripped into pieces.
 
Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.
 
You know he jumped off the Empire State Building this one time and he only sprained his ankle.
 
Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident....and still managed to walk it off.
 
Contrary to popular belief the Lottery numbers are not random. They are just the number of people Chuck Norris killed that given day.
 
Chuck norris invented the corndog.
 
The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain.  Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now.  Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.
 
Chuck Norris IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU.
 
Chuck Norris understands the ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey.
 
Chuck Norris belives the hype.
 
Chuck Norris CAN in fact stop the beat.
 
When Chuck Norris crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
 
When Chuck Norris picks his nose, he REALLY does find Gold.
 
Chuck Norris speaks in all caps.
 
Chuck Norris delivers more male with one thrust of his pelvis than the U.S. Postal Service and the Pony Express have combined for the last 146 years.
 
Chuck Norris wasn't born with feet, just boots.
 
Chuck Norris won a pissing contest against a Russian race horse.
 
When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang, the boomerang does not return because it is scared to come back.
 
Chuck Norris floats like a butterfly and stings like a tomahawk missile. At mach 3. In the face.
 
Chuck Norris can dribble a football.
 
Chuck Norris’ IQ can be expressed simply as a sideways eight
 
Chuck Norris is a stunt double for Optimus Prime.
 
Chuck Norris was once asked to repeat himself.  The last thing that person ever heard was the wooshing sound of a roundhouse kick.
 
Chuck Norris can clap with one hand.
 
Chuck Norris had his tonsels removed with a chainsaw.
 
Chuck Norris digs graves with a shoe horn


Those is the best! LMFAO!!!!!!!  Cheesy
Report Spam   Logged



                           *02/00/01*
Punkstar
Full Member
***
Posts: 151


Dead ****! & Detective Joe!


View Profile
« Reply #42 on: January 19, 2008, 05:50:43 pm »

I LOL'd at:
If Chuck Norris is late, then time better slow the **** down.

- - -

When Chuck Norris wants a whopper, he doesn't go down to Burger King. He roundhouse kicks the nearest cow.
Report Spam   Logged

-V1.0 Accomplishments-
1x TEWF Tag Team Champion (w/ Dynamite)


"The Original" PunkStar
03-00-00
Dave Johnson
Staff
Sr. Member
***
Posts: 419


Destruction is Dave Johnson


View Profile
« Reply #43 on: January 20, 2008, 06:37:53 am »

LMAO at:
Chuck Norris' smile once brought a puppy back to life.

Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.
Report Spam   Logged

Punkstar
Full Member
***
Posts: 151


Dead ****! & Detective Joe!


View Profile
« Reply #44 on: January 20, 2008, 11:56:32 am »

Chuck Norris's tears are said to cure cancer. Too bad he never cries.




























































EVER.
Report Spam   Logged

-V1.0 Accomplishments-
1x TEWF Tag Team Champion (w/ Dynamite)


"The Original" PunkStar
03-00-00


Pages: 1 2 [3] 4
  Print  
 
Jump to:  


Bookmark this site! | Upgrade This Forum
SMF For Free - Create your own Forum

Powered by SMF | SMF © 2016, Simple Machines
Privacy Policy